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July 4th: How to Celebrate with Those Who Have Differing Political Views

july 4th image of american flag waving in the wind.

The Fourth of July has traditionally been a time to celebrate with family and friends at picnics and barbecues. But currently, the way in which people of this nation have been embattled with one another over political ideologies, it is hard for some of us to see how we can celebrate July 4th without getting into a family feud.

We all have different viewpoints about politics and society as a whole. And in this day and age, our differences are glaringly more obvious. I have thought a lot about the different ideologies of the people I come across on a daily basis and have come up with a (simplistic) breakdown.

From my perspective, I think most of us fall into one of these 4 different categories in regards to political or societal concepts. What do you think? Would you categorize yourself or someone you know in any of these? Let’s take a peek.

  1. Those who love this country no matter what.
  2. Those who love Donald Trump no matter what.
  3. Those who love this country but realize it’s not perfect (has never been) but still feel blessed to live here.
  4. Those who think this country is trash because of all its flaws (both historically and present-day).

I am writing this as my opinion, of course, so don’t hate if you don’t agree. (However, I do love a hearty discussion). I am basing these 4 categories on my experiences with various people in different parts of the country. So let’s dive in.

1. Those Who Love This Country No Matter What

The people who love this country no matter what, tend to see this country as a beacon of hope and light to the world. They respect the military and honor all those who lived and died for our freedoms. They are often seen as highly patriotic.

One in this category may also shy away from acknowledging the hard truths about our country’s flawed past. The fact that our country may have been designed by the men who came from Europe, but was indeed built by the hands and feet, the blood, sweat, and tears of the many men, women, and children who were forced here to work against their will.

The person in this category may not understand why things that occurred decades or centuries ago still have a negative impact on the lives of others living today.

2. Those Who Love Donald Trump No Matter What

The people who love Former President Trump no matter what, also embody the sentiments of the first group. However, they go a few steps beyond. They are die-hard loyalists to the man who recently held the office of Commander in Chief and they may overlook or dismiss any of his short-comings on a moral or ethical level.

This person may often let slide the untruths or false statements, the mean or divisive language sometimes used by the former white house resident, towards those who oppose or disagree with him.

3. Those Who Love This Country (realized it is flawed) But Still Feel Blessed To Live Here

The people in this category tend to be patriotic, but not blindly so. They are able to recognize and acknowledge our history’s short-comings and failures as well as the moral atrocities from the past (and even the present).

They are also able to see the beauty of this country and it’s potential to be better. This person is also grateful for the freedoms they enjoy, have respect and honor for the military, give respect to the political offices, but call out bad-behaviors or injustices when they are seen and try to implement changes when necessary.

4. Those Who Think this Country is Trash Because of All its Flaws and Are Set Out to Change It.

These persons tend to have an outlook that this country is and was “no good” and that other countries have it better or are doing it right. They often feel the racist, misogynistic, homophobic, society that is and was, is the whole story of this country. They may overlook or take for granted the freedoms that one has simply because they live in the United States.

The majority of people I know who feel this way are in the millennial age group. (Again, just my perspective.) Perhaps it is because they weren’t alive to see or live through some of the experiences of the past. To know how it really felt to deal with the effects of war, of the civil rights movement and of blatant sexism.

They haven’t seen how far we have come from those deep pits to the place where we are today. They only see, hear and feel the current state of affairs. While they often play out in ways that are reminiscent of the past, they are not quite to that extreme.

The people in this group are often the ones holding marches today for various causes and are fighting for the rights of everyone. They are most often all-inclusive. They are also the ones who have little respect for authority or political figures (likely based on experiences) and are on a mission to change society for the better as they perceive it.

What Do You Think?

Do you think my assessments are on point or have I missed the mark? While someone may possess characteristics from more than one category, there will likely be one that stands out.

This brings me to my point. With these varying belief systems, how in the world can we interact with those who are of a different mindset? I have seen too many families and friendships go awry over this.

july 4th image of a american flag

So…How Can Those With Very Different Ideologies Get Along Today?

Let me start by saying that I fall into one of those categories, my parents fall into another and my adult child falls into yet another. So how do we have family gatherings without fireworks erupting?

Simple, once we have shared our viewpoints (at some place and time) we rarely discuss anything of a political nature again. Why? You might ask. How can you just ignore what is going on in this country and not discuss it?

It is not ignoring. It is simply choosing to agree to disagree and not risk ruining the relationship because of politics. There may be subtle ways to share things with the other person that are not an “IN YOUR FACE” approach.

I have found that most of our division comes from lack of understanding and fear. If we can somehow share our fears and why some words or actions hurt or diminish us, the opposing side may begin to soften.

It’s likely their stance won’t change, but at the very least, a level of understanding can begin. With that being said, some folks don’t and won’t listen to anything you have to say, any time of the day. So if you know that, don’t waste your breath.

So what do you do? Find things that you can bond over. Maybe it’s food or music. A favorite Netflix show. School, kids, work, anything. The political climate will eventually change. It’s just the nature of the beast. It’s not worth ruining a relationship over.

So… invite the family, the neighbors, and the friends over for a BBQ. Play corn-hole in the backyard. Laugh. Eat. Listen to music. Watch the fireworks. Celebrate the fact that because of July 4th, 1776 you are all together enjoying each others’ company.

This land may not be perfect, but it is ours.

Happy Fourth of July to All!

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6 thoughts on “July 4th: How to Celebrate with Those Who Have Differing Political Views

  1. This is a really interesting post and I think your breakdown of the four groups is really interesting, especially the tips for navigating a family gathering, etc, which must be really hard when families hold a very differing views. You’ve shared some good tips!

  2. This was a terrific post, Amy! I really admire your ability to navigate politics so deftly; as it is so easy to offend. Your four categories are very interesting; I have never thought about political affiliations this way, but they seem to work very well. I suppose I would fall into category #3.

    I also think it’s interesting that we tend not to discuss politics with family and friends if they have a different point of you. It’s unfortunate that so many of us hold our beliefs so closely that there is no room to discuss topics without intense emotion. It seems like we overidentify with certain politicians and points of view.

    Thanks for sharing. Again, well done!

    Roger

    1. Thanks so much Roger. The political climate right now is crazy. I tried my best to not offend.

      As always, I so appreciate your feedback. Thank You!

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